All images created by Nakia Reine For a while, the fashion industry has felt... stale. As someone who majored in fashion, graduated with a degree, and worked for some of the most well-known houses, I never thought I’d say that. But here we are. With the rise of fast fashion, social media mimicry, and micro-trends that vanish overnight, everything and everyone has started to look the same. The sparkle? Gone.The storytelling? Fizzled.The uniqueness that once made fashion feel magical? Now buried under algorithm, approved sameness. I couldn’t quite put my finger on what I was missing, until recently. It started slowly. I began stumbling across niche pockets of influencers celebrating traditional and era-specific styles. Quiet luxury, “old money” aesthetics... and suddenly I was hooked. It wasn’t just nostalgia; it was something deeper. Something familiar. Something soulful. Then Ralph Lauren dropped his Oak Bluff  collection. And that’s when it all clicked. All images created by Nakia Reine I was immediately captivated by the visuals—the rich tones, the timeless silhouettes—but what moved me most was the story behind it. The campaign drew from the legacy of Oak Bluffs in Martha’s Vineyard, a place where Black excellence and style have always thrived. And in true algorithmic magic, a video soon popped up on my YouTube feed—a behind-the-scenes look at the inspiration for the line. I sat, fully mesmerized, for all 20-something minutes. What struck me wasn’t just the fashion, it was the reminder : Black people have always had style. But more importantly, our style has always been shaped by our ingenuity and the environments in which we’ve thrived, despite the odds. Seeing stories told through the eyes of grandchildren who grew up hearing about and living in Oak Bluffs, I was transported. I was reminded of what fashion used  to be. Of what it could be again. All images created by Nakia Reine Back in the day, even vacation was an occasion. Suits. Linen. Knit sets. Perfectly packed wardrobes that made you ask, “Are you going somewhere special?” And the answer was often, “No, it’s just another day.” That kind of care, that kind of pride, that’s what I grew up seeing. My mother never missed a moment to dress us up. I remember her taking me to Macy’s, Hecht’s, and Woodies to find matching outfits for vacations. Even backyard cookouts had a dress code: frilly dresses, lace socks, Mary Janes, and bows. We showed up not to impress, but to express. That’s what fashion is supposed to be. Not a trend. A story. And Ralph Lauren’s Oak Bluff collection reminded me of that. It brought the roots of fashion back to the forefront. Roots built by people who understood that clothes were more than fabric—they were culture, pride, and identity woven into every thread. This wasn’t just about fashion. It was about us. Our legacy. Our elegance. Our storytelling. Our style. If you haven’t seen the collection, I’ve linked it below, along with the beautifully produced short film that shares the stories behind Oak Bluffs, told by those who lived it, loved it, and learned from it. For the first time, I want to visit Martha’s Vineyard, not for the vacation photos or coastal chic vibes, but to walk where our stories were born. To show my children a place where Black elegance wasn’t just admired, it was expected . Fashion may have felt flat to me for years, but this collection reminded me that it hasn’t lost its soul. It just needed to return home. Ralph Lauren- Oak Bluff

AI image created by Nakia Queen at Past FRWD Four years ago, my life looked completely different. I went into an office daily, and every Sunday, I carefully curated my outfits for the week ahead. Hours were spent in front of the mirror, crafting looks that spoke to my mood and aesthetic. I even planned two outfits per day—just in case the weather or my feelings shifted overnight. Mornings were a routine of precision. I’d get up early, get the little one ready, and we’d all walk out the door looking what I considered "put together." Then, COVID happened. Like many, my work dynamic shifted. Semi-hybrid turned into fully remote, which turned into a complete career pivot—one that led me to become a freelance designer. It was an incredible moment of growth, but I didn’t realize how much my sense of fashion had also shifted until the world started opening back up. For two years, I was dressing like I still had a 9-to-5 office job… even though that version of my life no longer existed. My Pinterest board was still full of “workwear chic” and structured outfits that no longer reflected my daily routine. And despite writing an entire piece about not wearing my inside clothes outside ( link to previous article ), I still felt disconnected from my wardrobe. So, I decided to run a little experiment on myself. The Style Identity Experiment Back in high school, I took photos of my outfits every day. Why? Because it was the late '90s, and I thought I was hot sh*t! But also, I wanted to make sure I wasn’t repeating outfits too often. That teenage mentality actually served a purpose. So, I decided to bring it back—only this time, with a little more intention. For one week (I initially planned for two, but I got what I needed in seven days), I documented my outfits and analyzed the. You can see my top 3 favorite looks below. The rules were simple: Wear what you normally wear.  No overthinking or deviating from my usual choices. (Full transparency: The first two days, I put in effort. By day three, my real self took over.) Take a photo of yourself right after getting dressed.  No fancy setup needed—just a mirror and good lighting. Ask yourself a few key questions at the end of the day.  ( I’ll be sharing these questions in a free guide—stay tuned! ) At the end of the experiment, reflect on what you learned. Sounds easy, right? It was. But what I discovered? That was the real surprise. What I Learned About My Style I’m not as stylish as I used to be—and that’s okay. My lifestyle no longer calls for high heels, blazers, and structured outfits. While I still love dressing up, it’s just not a necessity anymore. Simplicity is key, but layers are my thing. Even before adding a coat, I naturally gravitated toward layering pieces to create interest. I’ve always loved playing with silhouettes, and this experiment made me realize how much I lean into that. Comfort and ease come first. My go-to pieces are elevated sweats and well-fitting denim. Instead of starting with statement shoes or a tailored jacket, my foundation is whatever feels good to wear. I need to stop saving clothes for “special moments.” This was a big one. I wore pieces I had been “saving” for the right occasion—like a simple t-shirt that, for some reason, felt too precious to wear casually. Ridiculous, right? But we all do it. This experiment forced me to put those items into rotation. Breaking Free from Fashion “Rules” Social media bombards us with messages about what to wear, how to wear it, when to wear it, and what’s deemed “in” or “out.” It’s exhausting. But what if we simply said, "Stop telling me what to wear!" Instead of chasing trends, I’ve started embracing what makes me feel good, what aligns with my actual lifestyle, and what I genuinely love.  And the best part? By dressing for myself, I’m naturally creating a style that’s authentic and effortless. So, would you try this experiment? If so, I’ve made it easy for you! I created a free guide  to help you through the process—including the key questions I used for reflection. If you decide to do it, I’d love to hear what you discover! Email me your results—I might even feature your journey in a future post.

Midjourney Art created by: Nakia Reine I never thought I’d be one of those  people writing about a “social media detox.” Yet, here I am. But let’s be clear—I don’t see it as a detox. It’s more like a reintroduction to who I really am. Over the past few months, something felt… off. I found myself doom-scrolling—whether I was bored, anxious, avoiding something, or just being nosey. You know how it goes: open Instagram, scroll, laugh, share, and look up to realize an hour (or more) has vanished into the abyss. All I had to show for it were forwarded reels, a few likes, and a lingering sense of meh . So, one day, I decided to take a week off Instagram. That week turned into 30 days. Thirty days became 60. Now? It’s been over two months, and honestly, I’m not sure when I’ll go back fully. If you’re rolling your eyes right now (like I used to when reading posts like this), hear me out. This isn’t just another “I quit social media and became enlightened”  spiel. This is about reclaiming time, creativity, and peace of mind—and yes, it’s possible without deleting your accounts forever. Why Instagram Had to Go Let’s be real: Instagram used to be fun. It was selfies, memes, and the occasional avocado toast. Now? It’s a marketing juggernaut where algorithms decide what’s “important” to you. A quick scroll can take you from a cute puppy reel to full-on rage mode thanks to some clickbait nonsense. This emotional rollercoaster was exhausting. Worse, I realized Instagram was my crutch. Feeling stressed? Open the app. Avoiding a tough conversation? Scroll away. It was a digital security blanket, but it was suffocating me. So, I deleted the app. It felt like breaking up with a toxic ex—hard but necessary. The Tingles of Creativity Here’s the thing nobody tells you: when you step back from the noise, your mind gets louder in the best  way. I started noticing little sparks of creativity—what I call “the tingles.” Suddenly, I wanted to try embroidery, take a pottery class, and bake a lemon blueberry cake just because. And then, one Saturday, I found myself typing away at my iPad. That writing turned into a blog post. And that blog post turned into this blog—Past Fwrd. Funny how stepping away from one platform helped me rediscover another. Midjourney Art created by: Nakia Reine How to Navigate Your Own Break Thinking of trying a social media hiatus? Here’s what worked for me: Set Boundaries I deleted the Instagram app from my phone. Now, if I want to use it, I have to log in on my desktop. Trust me, scrolling while sitting upright at a desk is nowhere near as appealing as lounging on the couch. Identify Problem Platforms For me, Instagram was the main culprit. Figure out which platform drains you most and start there. Replace the Habit I swapped Instagram for Pinterest, which feels like a creative playground without the emotional baggage. Give Yourself Grace It’s not easy to quit cold turkey. Let your friends know you’re taking a break and ask them not to send you links or reels. Prepare for the Mental Shift I didn’t expect much from this experiment, but I gained clarity, creativity, and more meaningful time with my family. Ready to Try It? As 2025 approaches, why not add “Take two weeks off social media” to your goals? Delete the app, reclaim your time, and see what happens. You might just surprise yourself!

Christmas has always been my favorite holiday. Like many, every year, I’d dive headfirst into creating a brand-new theme. First, let me admit something: I love  a theme. Creating an atmosphere is something i truly enjoy! Over the years, this passion for decorating has led to an impressive—and honestly overwhelming—collection of holiday decor. From switching up color schemes to completely reinventing themes, I’ve been there and done it all. But this year, I decided to shake things up. For the past two years, I’ve been hyper-vigilant about overconsumption. I’ve asked myself hard questions before buying anything and embraced the idea of using what I already have. This Christmas, I took it a step further: no new decorations= No buy! Not a single shiny bauble, glittering garland, or irresistible festive find made its way into my cart. Instead, I challenged myself to use everything  I already owned—even if it didn’t “match” or fit a theme. Why? Because every piece I’ve collected over the years marks a moment in my family’s life, tied to memories of Christmases past. Here’s what I learned during my little experiment: 1. Walking into stores became stress-free Over the past few weeks, I strolled through festive aisles without the urge to buy a single thing. I gave myself permission to window shop, admire what was new, and simply leave empty-handed. No FOMO. No buyer’s remorse. I reminded myself, You already have a version of that—or better yet, you don’t need it at all. 2. Creativity thrives when you work with what you have Digging through my bins of decorations, I discovered treasures I forgot I owned—some still in their original packaging! This forced me to get creative, using items in ways I’d never considered before. I repurposed pieces, rearranged ornaments, and found joy in seeing old favorites in new settings. 3. I already had more than enough As I worked through my collection, I realized I had an abundance. Not just “enough,” but more than I could possibly use. It was a humbling reminder that the need to buy more often stems from outside pressure, not actual necessity. 4. The stress melted away Here’s a truth bomb: No one is coming to photograph my home. The only people who will see it are my family and friends—the ones who love me, mismatched ornaments and all. Letting go of the pressure to create a “perfect” Instagram-worthy display freed me to simply enjoy the process. Speaking of Instagram, I took a two-month break from the platform, which is a story for another day, but wow, what a difference it made! Being disconnected allowed me to move at my own pace, without the constant buzz of comparison in my head. 5. Memories matter more than trends My tree this year isn’t trendy. It’s filled to the brim with every piece of decor we own, and I love it. Every ornament tells a story—a snapshot of our lives. My daughters even rediscovered some of their handmade ornaments from years ago. Watching their excitement as they added them to the tree brought more joy than any store-bought decoration ever could. This season, I’ve learned that peace and joy look different for everyone. For me, it meant taking control—real control—of my home, my choices, and my holiday spirit. No more “doing it for the ‘gram.” So, tell me: How did you decorate for this Christmas season? Are you a theme person, or did you embrace the beauty of what you already have? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

All AI images created in midjourney by www.pastfrwd.com Last night, I watched a video on YouTube titled, How Fashion Trends Are Ruining Your Personal Style . As someone who has been infatuated with fashion since childhood, attended design school, and even crafted my own garments, I pride myself on knowing a bit more about fashion than the average person. But as I watched this video essay, I started to realize – she may be on to something. She broke down how trends are born, how we view body image, and how even the colors we gravitate toward have been subtly engineered and fed to us through radio ads, magazines, TV, and now social media. Suddenly, it hit me: Is my personal style really even mine? During the pandemic, I discovered the joy of comfortable clothing. With nowhere to go but the grocery store (masked and gloved) and an uncertain world outside, fashion became the last thing on my mind. But post-pandemic, I redefined my "style" to fit my new lifestyle – think comfortable chic. My work-from-home life doesn’t call for heels or fancy frocks, but my passion for fashion had dimmed, and this year, I decided to reinvent myself. As I watched this video, I kept hearing buzzwords I had used myself: "reinventing," "finding my personal style." My Pinterest boards were filled with terms like "old money style" and all the "cores." It hit me: Am I just a carbon copy of an influenced consumer?  Suddenly, I felt the need to re-evaluate what I really know about personal style. Without design houses, runway shows, and glossy magazines, would we even know what's "in"? Of course, it’s natural to be excited about something new, but the difference is in how we incorporate it into our unique style. Here’s what I’ve learned about truly setting yourself apart and stepping out of the loop of "engineered" style: AI image created through midjourney by www.Pastfrwd.com 1. Dress for Your  Body – Create a Uniform One of the core lessons in design school is that not every trend is for every body type. Knowing what enhances your features and fits you best goes beyond any fad. Look at icons like Carolina Herrera and Karl Lagerfeld, both known for their signature styles. Herrera’s crisp button-up shirts are iconic – I remember seeing her in NYC once, and her blouse practically glowed! And Karl? His classic black-and-white look is legendary. They both show that a "uniform" can be simple yet timeless, expressing an unmistakable personal style. When you find your "winning uniform," it sets you apart, giving you a look that’s yours regardless of trends. So, experiment with silhouettes and colors, then settle into what feels like you. 2. Dress for Your Lifestyle For years, my office attire defined my style. I often felt like I had to tone down my wardrobe to match my corporate environment, especially after pivoting to a government role. Gone were the days of fashion freedom, replaced with subdued blazers and sensible shoes. But as a full-time remote worker now, I no longer need that office-ready wardrobe. My first year working from home, I kept buying blazers and slacks out of habit, only to realize I didn’t need them. Now, my style reflects my reality: part athleisure, part cozy chic. I believe this is one of the most important aspects of dressing – catering to your life as it is now . When you dress to suit your lifestyle, you feel more comfortable and confident. And as I always say, " When you look good, you feel good . " 3. Wear What You  Like In design school, I was known for my favorite color combo – yellow and purple. Now, at 40, you’d be hard-pressed to see me in those colors together. But at the time, I wore what I loved. These days, it’s easy to feel pressure to wear what’s “in” or what strangers might compliment. Many of us dress for external validation rather than our genuine taste. This week, I was in DSW when a woman asked me if a pair of fold-over cowboy boots looked good. She had a unique, eclectic style, and while I wouldn’t wear those boots myself, they suited her. But I realized in that moment, I was tempted to influence her choice. I told her, "They’re trendy," and watched as she put them back on the shelf. Reflecting on it now, I think I should have just said, "How do you feel in them?" The truth is, wear what makes you happy.  Trends come and go, but style is cyclical. Take the Y2K trend – what was once "out" is now back in full force. So hold onto your skinny jeans, or better yet, find the cut that makes you feel amazing and keep rocking it. These are my three methods for reclaiming your style from the grip of trends. I’ll link the video I watched below, so you can dive in and form your own opinion. From now on, when someone asks my opinion in a store, my response will be, "How do you feel in it?" Because your personal style should be just that – personal. What About You? Have you noticed how your personal style has been influenced? How do you approach finding and maintaining a style that's truly yours? Share your thoughts!

I started my blog back when being a blogger wasn’t something you bragged about. You didn’t want anyone to know you were doing it. You were, in a way, a *secret* blogger. People imagined you tucked away in a basement, journaling for the whole world to read. Well, the only part of that that’s true is that, yes, if you had the desire to blog, you probably had a thing for journaling. I blogged for over a decade and during that time, I turned it into a real income stream. It wasn’t just pocket money either. My blog kept me afloat for years, clothed and fed my newborn daughter for the entire first year of her life. No joke—I didn’t have to buy a crib (sponsored), formula (sponsored), clothes, toys, or even teething medicine (all sponsored). For two years, I drove a new car every two weeks as a “car tester.” My old vehicle was on its last legs, so this kept me rolling in style and gave me a chance to explore new brands. My kids didn’t need new toys for nearly three years because of the campaigns I did with Mattel. Now, I’m not saying all of this to gloat. This isn’t me flexing—this is my *proof.* I’m not just about to tell you what *I think* you shouldn’t do; I’m telling you what *will* work, based on years of experience. Some of the tips on this list might be controversial, but that’s okay. Take what resonates, and leave what doesn’t. I know some people say blogging is dead, but I challenge that notion. Think about the dinner you made last night—did you cook it from scratch or did you Google a recipe? Even if you didn’t *read* the blog, I guarantee you landed on one to get that recipe. So, with that said, here are a few things you shouldn’t do if you’re starting a blog today. 1. Don’t Listen to Blogging Podcasts I know, coming in hot with a bit of controversy, but hear me out. Many of these podcasts are filled with personal opinions and sometimes outdated advice. Some of it is backed by experience, sure, but a lot of it is just regurgitated from Google searches and trends. The thing is, the “goalposts” for blogging keep moving, and all that extra noise will leave you feeling overwhelmed and unsure of where to start. So instead of spending hours listening to podcast episodes, start where you are. Trust that your idea is good enough and build from there. 2. Don’t Get Caught Up in Website Creation WordPress still exists. And yes, I know it’s a bit clunky at times, but it’s also full of templates that make life easier. Don’t waste time trying to make your site “perfect.” Use a template or a CMS like Wix or Squarespace. Your content is the star of the show—not your website design. Focus on what you're writing, and don’t get bogged down in the visuals just yet. 3. You Don’t Need to Be on Every Social Platform Let me say it louder for the people in the back—you do *not* need to be on every social media platform. It’s far more important to know who your audience is and where they spend their time. If they’re on Pinterest, go there. If they’re on Instagram, show up there. But they are *not* on every platform, and neither should you be. You might need a little trial and error to figure out where your people are, but trust me, you don’t need to spread yourself thin across the social landscape. 4. Don’t Niche Down (Unless You Want To) For years, I heard, “You’ve gotta niche down!” Well, no—you really don’t. For over a decade, I was a fashion, thrifting, lifestyle, travel, motherhood, car-reviewing, and (briefly) cooking blogger. You know what all that variety taught me? It helped me figure out what I actually enjoyed writing about. We all have a variety of interests, so start by sharing what you do every day. Write about your college journey, your experiences as a new mom, or your solo travels. Your audience will grow and evolve with you, and they’ll stay for your versatility. In a world of short attention spans and constant need for variety, why not offer both? 5. Don’t Write for the Brands—Make the Brands Come to You This is a lesson I learned the hard way. That brief stint as a “cooking blogger” came about because I thought, “Well, I need more campaigns, so let’s give this a shot.” I got a campaign, sure—but I hated every second of it. I’m *not* someone who enjoys sharing what I’m cooking. That whole experience taught me that I can’t just write what I think brands want me to write. Write what *you* know, what you’re passionate about, and the brands will come knocking. Those are a few things I’ve learned from over a decade of blogging. They not only helped me succeed, but they kept blogging fun and financially rewarding. Don’t get me wrong—blogging takes work, and it takes time. But with a clear plan and steady momentum, you *can* build something amazing. Now, you might be wondering, “Okay, if that’s what not to do, what should I actually do?” Don’t worry, that’s coming soon! Make sure to join my newsletter so you can get those tips straight to your inbox. And if you’re new to blogging, let me know in the comments—what’s one thing you’ve done that you’d never do again?

If you follow luxury fashion in any capacity, I'm sure you've seen the headlines about the Dior and Armani Italian Maker raid. I've read the articles, watched YouTube's opinions, and even seen social media's take on what has happened, and as I take in the information, one word keeps popping into my head: "ethics." When the story broke from the Wall Street Journal about the alleged $57 manufacturing cost and $2,780 retail price, wasn't surprising. In my early fashion design career, I remember seeing the cost sheets from the merchandising department. My mouth fell open as I compared the manufacturing costs to the retail prices. At that moment, I vowed only to buy things on sale or at an outlet. This decision was based on my surface-level understanding of the fashion industry. What bothered me most were the wages and working conditions of the workers. Without standing on my soapbox and spilling lines about consumerism, ethics, and outsourcing, I want to take a different approach. Let's use an e-commerce giant everyone knows intimately, Shein. Many headlines have been written about this popular online store, and documentaries have been made on popular streaming networks investigating its conditions and brand history. Despite all this information, what has happened to Shein? You know the answer without me stating it. As consumers, we have the right to decide where our hard-earned money goes. Once a business's curtain is pulled back and its secrets are revealed, we have a choice. Over the years, I believe the ethical injustices we see are fueled by what is now known as "hyperconsumerism." If this term is new to you, here's Wikipedia's definition: "Hyperconsumerism, hyper-consumerism, hyperconsumption, or hyper-consumption is the consumption of goods beyond one's necessities and the associated significant pressure to consume those goods, exerted by social media and other outlets as those goods are perceived to shape one's identity." Like everything in this world that we discover as painful to our society, it took us years to get here. Unfortunately, it will take years to fix it. What's happening in our fashion space is disheartening, and today's news will be overshadowed by tomorrow's, eventually forgotten. To close this article on a more upbeat note, let's discuss in the comments section what you, as a consumer, can do to try and micro-shift what's happening in our fashion space. For me, I plan to make a note of these brands and choose not to support them with my hard-earned money. Right now, earning takes skill, and blowing it all away to wear what the latest celebrity or influencer has been gifted is not the road I plan to drive on. Here are some articles to dive deeper into what’s happening: Forbes: Italian Court Reveals Dior's Unethical Supply Chain New York Post: Dior & Armani's Pricey Handbags Made by Migrant Workers Wall Street Journal: Dior & Armani's Italy Supply Chain Labor Issues Complex: Dior & Armani Paying Migrant Workers $2 for Luxury Bags

All image AI generated by Nakia Reine If you’re anything like me, your social media feed is a whirlwind of DIY skincare hacks, influencer recommendations, and the latest beauty product launches. As a skincare enthusiast, I find myself both fascinated and overwhelmed by the constant stream of advice from dermatologists and influencers alike. Recently, this obsession hit close to home when my tween daughter, affectionately known as Doll, asked me for her own skincare routine. Her request made me smile, remembering my own teenage years when I yearned for the pink Olay moisturizer. I’d watch my grandmother apply it with such ritualistic grace – a tiny dollop massaged into her hands, then gently smoothed onto her face in an upward motion. It was a nightly ceremony that seemed both mystic and comforting. I wanted to be part of that ritual, so I asked my mom for my own jar. Her response? A firm no, and to this day, I laugh about it. My mom, in her wisdom, spared my youthful skin from unnecessary products. Fast forward to today, and Doll’s reasons for wanting a skincare routine were not just nostalgia but influenced by what she sees online – the allure of cute products and the desire to emulate the beauty routines of influencers. Naturally, I said no and explained that she’d need to wait. At this point, I was deeply involved in the skincare space, collaborating with dermae , a brand I admire for its natural ingredients. I reached out to them, only to learn that their products weren’t suitable for tweens, which was something I respected. All image AI generated by Nakia Reine Determined to find the right path for Doll, I dove into research on tween skincare. This journey led me to discover three brands that became the foundation of my passion project, “Lather.” Through consultations with respected brands and dermatologists, I learned that tweens don’t need an elaborate regimen. For children under 13, the essentials are a simple moisturizer, a mild cleanser, and sunscreen. At 13, Doll transitioned to using products from Bubble, which offers a straightforward approach with ingredients that I trust. Her routine now includes a moisturizer, cleanser, and sunscreen – all designed for her age. Here’s where marketing comes into play. We’ve all been influenced for years, whether by our immediate environment or through various media channels. While social media has amplified this influence, the need for careful consideration before adopting trends remains crucial. For our kids, it’s our responsibility to research and ask the right questions before jumping on the latest bandwagon. So, I’m curious – when did you start using skincare products? I began at 14, with my first product being Clearasil, not Olay. Share your skincare journey and experiences in the comments below!

All AI images created by Nakia Reine We’ve all heard it referred to in different ways: "schedule," "routine," or my personal favorite, "ritual." Whatever word resonates with you, it doesn't change the ultimate goal—creating what I like to call a *state of flow* when you're a work-from-home mom. Over the years, I've picked up countless books on organizing, structuring, and somehow managing to run my home like a well-oiled machine. But let me tell you a little secret: that’s not reality. As I watched yet another "Day in the Life" of a woman who is not a mom or doesn’t juggle multiple streams of income, I realized these are all kaleidoscopes of lies. The reality for a mom who works from home is that structure has to be ever-changing. You may be wondering: *But how do I even begin to do that?* Don’t worry, I’m not here to give you another list of 5 steps or 10 reasons why your current routine is all wrong. Instead, I’m going to share what *I* do—flaws, flexibility, and all—and you can take what you like from it. My mornings, as much as I’d love for them to be picture-perfect, do *not* begin with me waking up in flawless PJs, with perfect hair and “I woke up like this” makeup. I don’t glide into a softly lit room to sip coffee while birds serenade me. That’s just not my reality. Here’s how it actually goes: My alarm goes off at 5:30 a.m. Some days, I roll out of bed, one eye open, because I’ve remembered my *why* and the reason not to hit snooze. Other days? My body screams for more rest, and I listen. I switch off the alarm and decide to wake when the kids do, giving myself an extra 30 minutes of sleep. What I’ve learned is to create a state of flow that *aligns with my body’s needs*. If I feel like rising early to read, meditate, and write, and my day allows for that—perfect. If it doesn’t? I adjust and flow. Here’s the simple foundation of my mornings: 1. Mental Space is Non-Negotiable I *must* make time for my mental well-being. Whether it’s 15 minutes to meditate or 30 minutes to journal, this time is sacred. Sometimes it’s just sitting in stillness with my thoughts. It helps me reset before the day kicks into gear. 2. Move Your Body Movement is key, but I choose *when*, *where*, and *how*. It could be a brisk 30-minute walk (a new addition to my mornings), an intense HIIT workout, or even a simple stretch. No matter what, I check in with my body and go from there. 3. The Girls Come First My mornings revolve around my daughters—making breakfast, helping with lunch, brushing hair, and giving out those essential morning hugs and kisses. No matter what else is happening, they are always my first priority once I’m up. 4. Feed Your Creativity This one is flexible. Some days I dive into something creative—whether it’s designing, writing, or sketching ideas for a new project. When it happens, it’s a beautiful release, but it doesn’t have to happen daily. It’s all about flow. 5. Dinner Planning I wish I could say I pre-plan our meals each week, but let’s be real—that’s not always the case. Every day, I mentally take stock of what we have and decide what’s for dinner. I often pair this with my walk or physical movement, multitasking like the pro I am. These five things are my non-negotiables . They give me structure, but they also ebb and flow with the day’s needs. Having a preset day would be lovely, but it’s just not realistic, and honestly? It feels robotic. I understand that "flow" is subjective, so I encourage you to come up with 3 to 5 of your own non-negotiables to build your foundation. And most importantly, be *kind* to yourself. Don’t get caught up in the rose-colored pages of “perfect morning routines” or “how I do it all as a mom of X children.” Those are just myths. As a mom of two girls, who has worked from home for three years while juggling side gigs, I can tell you this: flow and grace are all you need to keep your feet on the ground. Now that I’ve shared my state of flow, I’d love to hear how you create yours. Drop your daily rhythms in the comments, and let’s learn from each other. Maybe we’ll even discover a few new flows we hadn’t considered! Let’s keep flowing, together.

All image AI generated by Nakia Reine I still remember the thrill of writing my first blog post in 2007, excitedly sharing the news of the Proenza Schouler collaboration with Target. At the time, I was still working in the fashion industry, and the idea that a designer of this caliber would create designs at a Target price point was captivating. It opened up high fashion to the masses and introduced these designers to people who might not have known them otherwise. I thought it was genius. How did I buy my clothes from the same place I buy my paper towels? Now, here we are in 2024. I’m standing in a Target aisle with a cart filled with paper towels and toiletries, trying to decide which matching short set I like best. How did we get here? How did I buy my clothes from the same place I buy my paper towels? From a convenience perspective, this checks the productivity box—milk, eggs, and a new pair of shorts—all in one stop. But from a quality perspective, I know this linen blend short set will barely make it through the summer if I wash it too much. I miss the days when things were compartmentalized: groceries from the grocery store, shoes from the shoe store, and clothes from a store that sold only clothing. Because I believe in transparency, it feels hypocritical to criticize a place I once praised so fervently. But as I slide into my 40s, finding that I can no longer shop at Forever 21 for obvious reasons (not the midriffs, but the quality), I find myself shopping at Target and other big-box department stores. Is this really what fashion looks like for women in their 40s? All image AI generated by Nakia Reine Let’s talk about when clothing was just that—clothing. Pure, 100% cotton and linen garments, not the hybrid materials we see today, are designed for quantity over quality. Yes, we get them at a lower price, but is it worth it? If you look at Target's trajectory of collaborations as they " Celebrate 20 years of Designer Collaborations ", you’ll see it’s been a while since they’ve teamed up with a big designer. Just recently, they collaborated with Diane von Furstenberg, who I adored as a fashion kid. Fun fact: I used to sit in her store’s seating area in Soho, hoping she would walk through the store to see her. Did I buy some of the pieces from her Target collaboration? Absolutely. However, I was disappointed because the materials had to be changed to meet the price point for the masses. I walked away with two pieces and the sting of disappointment. Big-box stores like Target give the masses a chance to experience fashion through these collaborations, but the reality is that the label is as close as you’ll get to the designer piece—the quality just isn’t there. So, let’s end with a conversation starter: What’s your take on buying clothing where you buy your paper towels? What do you think of these drugstore collaborations, and have you participated in any? Let’s chat! Links to dive deeper: - New York Time on Target Collaboration - DVF Collaboration

All image AI generated by Nakia Reine Let’s be honest—most trends come and go without even a blip on my radar. These days, my lifestyle just doesn’t call for the same “dress to impress” mentality I used to have. I’ve been working from home for the last four years, so the days of strutting down the street with a massive tote slung over my shoulder are long gone. But then came the mini bag trend, and let me tell you, it’s like this one was tailor-made for my life right now. You see, those oversized bags I used to carry? Yeah, they’re collecting dust somewhere in the back of my closet. My little ones have grown up, so the need for hauling around half the house is no longer a thing. And that “work bag” I used to swear by? It doesn’t have a place here anymore. A few years ago, I switched to crossbody bags for the convenience, and honestly, I haven’t looked back. But these mini bags? They’ve taken my downsizing obsession to a whole new level. All image AI generated by Nakia Reine Back in the day, I was that girl—the one who had everything you could possibly need in her bag, just in case. I was basically a walking emergency kit. But now? If I’m running out the door, all I need are my keys, wallet, phone, and maybe a lip balm. That’s it. SIMPLE. When COVID hit, I pared things down even more. I was just grabbing my keys and a wristlet wallet and heading out the door. But that little setup came with its own dangers—I can’t tell you how many times I almost left that wristlet behind in some random aisle at Target. But with a mini bag, I’ve found the perfect solution. It’s small enough to be convenient, yet big enough to hold the essentials, and it’s stylish to boot. Now, I’d be lying if I said I haven’t spent way too much time scrolling through “What’s in My Mini Bag” reels, marveling at the tiny versions of everyday items that fit perfectly inside these bags. In my opinion, this trend strikes the perfect balance between functionality and style, and I am absolutely here for it! So, what about you? Are you still clinging to your oversized bag, or have you joined the “mini but mighty” movement

All images AI created by Nakia Reine You may know her—or you might even be her—the woman who, in the drop-off line or while strolling down the aisles of Target, is still in her inside clothes. What are “inside clothes,” you ask? They’re those cozy, sometimes worn-out pieces meant strictly for home. Think oversized sweatpants that have seen better days, or those trusty leggings with elastic that’s lost its grip. They’re the clothes you wear for chores, yard work, or just lounging around. Think oversized sweatpants that have seen better days, or those trusty leggings with elastic that’s lost its grip. They’re the clothes you wear for chores, yard work, or just lounging around. Before you start panicking and wonder how you ended up here, know that you're not alone. As a work-from-home mom, I’ve been there too. Many days, I dash out of the house at the last minute to pick up the girls, only to realize I’m still in my oversized sweats, faded tee, and those slip-on crocs that were meant for quick errands around the yard. It’s not until I catch a glimpse of myself in the car window or the reflection in Target that I realize my mistake. All images AI created by Nakia Reine We've all worn our inside clothes outside at some point. But how can we break this habit? Here are 5 tangible steps to help you transition from inside-the-house attire to clothing that makes you feel confident and ready for the world. 1. Out of Sight, Out of Mind: Remove “House Clothes” from Easy Reach Those cozy clothes we love to lounge in can quickly become our default attire, even when we should be stepping out. Start by moving your “inside-only” clothes to a less accessible spot—like a different drawer or the back of your closet. When these garments aren’t in immediate view, you’ll be more likely to reach for clothing that’s appropriate for outside activities. 2. Create a Style Uniform for Ease Decision fatigue is a real thing, and it can make getting dressed feel overwhelming. Simplify your life by creating a “uniform” of outfits that make you feel stylish and put-together. Consider a capsule wardrobe with versatile pieces that can be easily mixed and matched. Whether it’s chic jeans with a tailored top or a comfy, stylish dress, having a go-to look will streamline your mornings and boost your confidence. 3. Redefine What "Outside Clothes" Mean to You Reframe what you consider “outside” clothes. Comfort doesn’t have to mean sloppy. Invest in high-quality materials and well-fitting pieces that blend ease with style. Swap out loose loungewear for cozy knit sets or upgrade those worn-out leggings to stylish joggers or tailored trousers. The goal is to dress in a way that feels both comfortable and confident, whether you’re running errands or meeting friends. 4. Plan Ahead with Pre-Selected Outfits Time crunches can be a major hurdle. To make dressing up easier, plan your outfits in advance. Spend a few moments each week selecting looks that you know work well for you. Having pre-set outfits eliminates the stress of last-minute decisions and ensures that even on busy mornings, you can step out feeling stylish and prepared. 5. Incorporate Accessories to Elevate Your Look Accessories can transform even the simplest outfit. Elevate your look with a statement necklace, bold earrings, or a chic hat. These finishing touches can turn an ordinary outfit into something special, helping you express your style effortlessly. Whether you’re heading out for groceries or a casual lunch, accessories add that extra flair and confidence. As we all navigate the balance between comfort and style, it’s important to remember that how we dress can truly impact how we feel. Stepping outside in something that makes you feel confident and put-together doesn’t just change your look—it changes your mindset. So, tell me—what’s your go-to “inside” outfit that you’ve accidentally worn outside? Or better yet, how have you elevated your everyday look lately? I’d love to hear about your style journey and any tips you’ve picked up along the way. Share your thoughts in the comments below or tag me in your transformation posts on social media—I can’t wait to see how you’ve reclaimed your personal style! ✨👗